Play time

So, we have no tv at home. We have a plan of buying one but keep delaying it when we see or children play more with one another. It's been half a year. Ok, they still watch downloaded videos from youtube, but it's not as often as they watched tv back then. Their favourites are Barbie: life in the dream house, upin ipin, coco mong and children songs. So, what are they doing during the day?

Playing teacher

The box that keeps the house tidy of toys

Playing with balls

Playing bike

Messing the house

Learn to read the arabic

Take a nap

Playing doctor

Fahira: Apologizing

Fahira is in the second grade now and has a lot of friends. She plays with her sisters at home, plays with children her age in our neighborhood, plays with her friends at school and plays with children in her grandparent's neighborhood when she visits them (which is very often). Sometimes, one or two of her schoolmates come to our house after school to play until evening. I let them do so, but my regulation is that they must come back home first to tell their mothers. I don't want their mothers worry of where their children missing after school.

And when children play, there will always be things to start a fight among them. Whether it is about the toys or one wants to be the leader or whatever, fight amongs children while playing is usual.

The question is what we should do as parent when we witness this happen? I myself will let them cope their problems by themselves. But if the problem was quiet serious, I would ask what happen and listen to both sides explaining the situation. Then I would try to find the fair solution and make them be friends again. Usually it was just about "selfishness" little children do have (we all have been children and know what it feels). The hard part is just asking the child to apoligize. But with good words and right attitude, these children will sure be tamed. 

Just one thing I would love to tell new parents :  just as quarreling while playing is usual, they forgive and forget the quarrel way faster than we imagine. So just don't involve too much. Your words might hurt other parent if you blame her child. And surely it will last longer in her heart while your children already act like nofight ever happen.

Farisha : Mimicking

Farisha is already 1 year now. And she is learning to copy what her sisters do.

She will pick up the phone and says "ya"  and she loves disturbing her sister eating.

Hugs

When I was a young girl, I remember my mom always hug and kiss me before sleeping at night saying "selamat bobok ya nak" (Have a nice sleep my girl). And to me it was so comforting. I do the same thing to my girls now to ensure them experiencing the same comfort like I did.

I ever read that touch is more than words expressing love. I agree. When I was a single, worked, far from parents, rented a room. I felt like I was free. Yes, I was free to do what I like, eat what I want, go wherever I loved to. I didn't think I miss a thing.  But, I did miss those touches. Sometimes, I just didn't know what to do. I lost direction. I need to be touched, hugged, loved. Then I got married, have children and then I found out why it is said that marriage will make your life complete. I hug and kiss my husband and children everyday. We even kiss and hug one another when we just wake up in the morning and still that smell. At this stage I think touches as the expression of acceptance. You don't need to be somebody else to be loved. You even don't have to take a bath first, ha!

I know, not every family has a routine of hugging and kissing as an expression of love. But if you are the mother of the house, I encourage you to start now, even if your children are already a big person. Sometimes they experience rejection out there. Why don't we hug them often to show that  they are loved nomatter what. It will booze self-confidence.

And anyway, hugging your husband everymorning, even when you just had a quarell, will show forgiveness and add romance. I tried it before. It felt awkward first, but it did fix the relationship. :)

Farisha

Farisha Ramadhani, our youngest girl. 8 months old. She can already sit, crawl and try to stand. But she doesn't have anytooth yet.

She drinks breast milk and eat solid which I change every couple of days. Because the solids keep changing, she will eat the first bite suspiciously, taste it first before deciding to like it or not.

Here is a picture of her first bite of everymeal. Hahahaha.

Fatimah

Fatimah Maysarah. Our second daughter. Almost 3 years old. She is the most active of my three daughters. The fearless one. She is the one who is brave enough not to say sorry to us, her parents, when she made mistakes and doesn't feel like saying sorry. It's not that she's naughty, she is just being frank with her feeling. I know, I must figure up better way to treat her with her unique character.

One thing about Fatimah that tests me as parent. She always wakes up at night, crying loudly. It has been since she was a baby. I've checked everything, whether she is hungry, too tired, not comfortable clothes or bed, or if there's an insect bites her. I'ved checked it all. And then I found out that she has itchs all over her body mostly legs. We went to doctors to get medicines to cure it. They said it's alergy, but we must find out, what thing is alergetic to her.

I started finding out from food. I took some food that I thought migh be alergetic, out of her daily meals per week. But, the itch was still there, even when she was already vegetarians.
We went to the doctor again, he said then probably it was not froom food, might be the air or water then he gave us a kind of cream to reduce it.
Well, the air is probably right, I thought. We live in Indonesia, a tropical country, where the average temperature is 18-32°c all year long. It's the heat.

Then I tried to make the room cooler by swithing the fan all night long, but didn't place it right towards her and applied the cream given by the doctor after bath and before sleep. The cream did make the watery little bumps dry, but it didn't make the itchs gone.

Until just a few weeks ago, when I had a chat with my neighboors, fellow homemakers, one evening. We talked about children, food etc. Long story short, they suggested me using 'Karo oil' for Fatimah. Karo is a name of one of the ehnic groups in my country. My country Indonesia has a lot of ethnic groups with their own languages, cultures, traditions and alternative medicines.

I tried to apply the oil on her when she is asleep. And, it really works like magic. She doesn't wake up and cry that very night. I don't know the ingredients of the oil, but I can smell the mix of pandanese leaf, clove and ginger in it. Now, I apply it on her after bath and before sleep, it dry the watery little bumps on fatimah's skin but mosturize the skin in the same time.

Now, I'll try to eliminate the scars left on her skin.

Fahira

Fahira Azzahra, my eldest daughter. She is almost 7 years old now. I keep wondering a lot of times, how time flies so fast. Sometimes, I still remember her as that tiny baby. And now, she is in the first grade already. She can read, write, count. Hmmmm, my big girl. I'm feeling kind of old. :-P.

The other thing that makes me proud of her is that she loves cleaning. She likes to offer help when I'm doing house work. 

Like this afternoon, I took candid pictures of her sweeping and scrubbing the floor of the little terrace. Ours is very tiny one. We rent this house 4 months ago. A small house, unlike when we still live with my mother in law's house. But we're okay with it. Starting small is a good thing. My daughter will learn to clean small space first before stepping to a bigger one when we can afford to buy a house.

Her work is quite tidy, not perfect. But I adore her, adore her willing to do. I always say great job, even if l will redo it later (but not in most cases). This little girl needs support in this age. She will learn to fix her own mistakes if she does it frequently. As Indonesian proverb says "Alah bisa, karna biasa" "You can, when you make yourself used to it".